Funny Facebook Status Updates

Facebookers know that some of the status updates their friends make are off the wall. This post lists some of the funnier Facebook status updates from Geeker’s Magazine.

When someone rings the doorbell, why do dogs always assume it’s for them?

People say that love is in every corner……gosh! maybe i’m moving in circles..

Why is a newspaper ten times more interesting when somebody across the table is reading it?

Yes, I know how to shut up. I just don’t know when.

Me and the gummy bears have a plot to rule the world but shhhhh its a secret.

I thinks my neighbor just caught me stealing his Wi-Fi internet.

¡ǝɯıʇ ǝɯɐs ǝɥʇ ʇɐ ʞooqǝɔɐɟ ǝsn puɐ puɐʇspuɐɥ ɐ op ʎןןɐuıɟ uɐɔ

I married my wife for her looks. But not the ones she’s been giving me lately!

All men are born free and equal. If they go and get married, that’s their own fault

U have 10 fish, 5 drown, 3 come back to life. How many fish do you have? Stop counting smart one. Fish cant Drown.

These status updates are from

Tomorrow I’m gonna write a blog post about procrastination.

You have a cough? Go home tonight, eat a whole box of Ex-Lax, tomorrow you’ll be afraid to cough

Why do men chase women they have no intention of marrying? For the same reason dogs chase cars they have no intention on driving.

Wouldn’t it be good if Ctrl+Alt+Del worked for ex husbands

60 percent of users are thinking about leaving Facebook. The CEO of Facebook said it will make changes starting tomorrow. If the percentage of people leaving goes past 80% it will start calling itself MYSPACE.